The short version
The Charaka Samhita has two words for the grudge many families carry. In Sutrasthana 8.18, inside sadvritta, the code of good conduct, Charaka lists what a good person is. Two of the words on that list are kshamavan, forbearing and forgiving, and paraparushavachana-sahishnu, one who can bear other people's harsh words. In plain words: learn to forgive, and don't hit back at a harsh word in the moment.
Charaka gives no reasons. Two well-known experiments supply some. When people remembered someone who had hurt them and nursed the grudge, their heart rate and blood pressure rose more than when they thought about forgiving that person. And students who were insulted, then vented on a punching bag while thinking of the person who insulted them, ended up the angriest of all; those who simply sat quietly for two minutes were the least angry. This page is the full version of our reel on the same verse, with the Sanskrit, the words around it, and a week of practice for letting an old grudge go.
Explore Ayurveda Hub →इस लेख को हिंदी में पढ़ें: चरक संहिता में क्षमा: कड़वी बात सहना और पुरानी नाराज़गी छोड़ना
📖 13 min read · Charaka Samhita, Sutrasthana 8.17–8.18
What this article covers
- Why a medical text talks about forgiving: sadvritta and the mind
- The words in Sutrasthana 8.18, one by one
- Kshamavan: don't nurse a grudge for years
- Paraparushavachana-sahishnu: don't hit back at a harsh word
- Sama-pradhana: when the grudge is inside the family
- Letting an old grudge go this week
- What forgiving is not
- From our shelf
- More to read on this topic
- Frequently asked questions
Why a Medical Text Talks About Forgiving: Sadvritta and the Mind
Chapter 8 of the Charaka Samhita's Sutrasthana is the Indriyopakramaniya Adhyaya, the chapter on caring for the indriyas, the senses and the organs of action, and for the mind that runs them. We walk through the whole chapter in Charaka Samhita Part 8. Some of its lines already have their own pages: the rules of speech in Rules of Speech in Charaka Samhita, the rules of trust in Rules of Trust in Charaka Samhita, and the line on envy in Envy in Charaka Samhita. This page stays with forgiving, and with the harsh word that so often starts the need for it.
Charaka explains why such rules belong in a medical text at the start of the code. Verse 8.17 says that everyone who wants their own good should follow sadvritta, good conduct, all of it, always, with the mind on it. Verse 8.18 says what it gives: practised, it brings two things at once, arogya (health) and indriya-vijaya (mastery over the senses). Then the verse becomes a long list of how a good person lives: how they behave with teachers and elders, how they keep themselves clean, how they hold their mind and their tongue.
Many families carry one old grudge. Two brothers stop speaking over a share of a house. A cousin is left off a wedding list. A parent and a grown child go years without a proper conversation. Each side has a story, and each story gets told again at every family event. Charaka did not write about property papers or wedding lists, but two words in his list speak straight to this.
Texts like the Charaka Samhita were once kept as palm-leaf bundles like this one, between boards and tied with a cord.
The Words in Sutrasthana 8.18, One by One
The list in verse 8.18 runs for many lines. The words on forgiving and on harsh words come in two places. Here they are in the Sanskrit, as printed in the Charaka Samhita edition of the Charak Samhita Research, Training and Skill Development Centre (2020):
Charaka Samhita, Sutrasthana 8.18 (two parts)
… निश्चिन्तः, निर्भीकः, ह्रीमान्, धीमान्, महोत्साहः, दक्षः, क्षमावान्, धार्मिकः, आस्तिकः …
… क्रुद्धानामनुनेता, भीतानामाश्वासयिता, दीनानामभ्युपपत्ता, सत्यसन्धः, सामप्रधानः, परपरुषवचनसहिष्णुः, अमर्षघ्नः, प्रशमगुणदर्शी, रागद्वेषहेतूनां हन्ता च …
The translation below is our plain rendering, checked against the 2020 edition's English.
Seven words for a person who can forgive
1. Kshamavan: forbearing, forgiving; one who has kshama.
2. Kruddhanam anuneta: one who calms people who are angry.
3. Sama-pradhana: one who puts the gentle way, conciliation, first.
4. Paraparushavachana-sahishnu: one who can bear (sahishnu) the harsh (parusha) words (vachana) of others (para).
5. Amarshaghna: one who puts an end to amarsha, intolerance and resentment.
6. Prashama-guna-darshi: one who sees the value of calm.
7. Raga-dvesha-hetunam hanta: one who removes the causes of attachment and aversion.
Two of these carry our reel. Kshama is the everyday Hindi word for forgiveness, and kshamavan is the person who has it. The 2020 edition's English gives it as "forbearing": someone who can hold back from paying a hurt back. The long compound paraparushavachana-sahishnu is the same quality at the moment of the hurt: when someone else's words are harsh, you can bear them without striking back.
As with the rest of the code, Charaka states the words and moves on. The reasons in the next two sections are modern ones, from experiments on grudges and on venting anger, and we credit them to the researchers who did the work, not to Charaka.
Kshamavan: Don't Nurse a Grudge for Years
A grudge is a hurt we keep replaying. Something happened once, years ago, and we go back to it again and again: at a family dinner, on a sleepless night, every time a certain name comes up. Charaka's word asks for the opposite: be kshamavan, someone who can let it go.
A grudge is often older than it feels: two boys in one photograph, two men who no longer speak.
A well-known experiment looked at what that replaying does in the moment. In 2001 the psychologists Charlotte vanOyen Witvliet, Thomas Ludwig and Kelly Vander Laan published "Granting Forgiveness or Harboring Grudges: Implications for Emotion, Physiology, and Health" in the journal Psychological Science. They asked 71 people to bring to mind a real person who had hurt or wronged them. Then, in short spells of imagination, each person did two different things. Sometimes they replayed the hurt and nursed the grudge. Other times they tried to see the other person as a human being with their own story, and imagined forgiving them.
All the while, instruments recorded their heart rate, their blood pressure, the sweat on their skin, and the tension in the brow muscle that pulls the face into a frown. The difference was clear. Nursing the grudge brought more negative feeling and bigger rises from resting levels in all of these. Some of the rises were still there in the quiet periods afterwards. Forgiving thoughts, in the authors' words, prompted greater perceived control and comparatively lower physiological stress responses.
Replaying a hurt is not just a thought: in the 2001 experiment, the body joined in.
We should be careful about what this shows. The study measured a few seconds at a time, in a laboratory. It does not tell us what years of grudge-keeping do to anyone. What it does show is that each replay of a grudge is not just a thought: the body joins in, and it settles more when the thought turns to forgiving. A grudge kept for years is a replay you choose many times over.
Try this. Think about the person you are angry with from their side for a few minutes. What was going on in their life when it happened? What were they worried about, or afraid of? This is the part of the experiment that went with forgiving thoughts. You do not have to agree with what they did. You only have to see them as a whole person.
Paraparushavachana-sahishnu: Don't Hit Back at a Harsh Word
Most grudges begin with a moment: something harsh is said, and something harsher is said back. Charaka's long word is about that moment. Being sahishnu towards harsh words means you can take them without hitting back right then.
Many of us believe the opposite: that anger is like steam and has to be let out, by shouting, by slamming a door, by hitting something. A famous experiment tested that idea directly. In 2002 the psychologist Brad Bushman published "Does Venting Anger Feed or Extinguish the Flame?" in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. Six hundred college students each wrote a short essay. It came back marked by a supposed partner with harsh comments, including "This is one of the worst essays I have read!" There was no partner; the researchers wrote the comments themselves.
Venting feels like letting the anger out. In the 2002 experiment, it kept the anger going.
Then the angry students were split into three groups. The first group hit a heavy punching bag for as long as they liked while thinking about the person who had insulted them, whose photo they were shown. The second group hit the same bag while thinking about getting fit. The third group did not hit anything: they sat quietly for two minutes. Afterwards everyone said how angry they felt, and then played a game in which they could blast their insulter with loud noise.
The students who vented on the bag while thinking of the insulter were the angriest, and they blasted the loudest and longest noise. The students who had simply sat quietly for two minutes had the lowest anger and the lowest aggression of all. In Bushman's words, doing nothing at all was more effective than venting anger.
Two quiet minutes: the students who did nothing at all ended up the least angry.
That is paraparushavachana-sahishnu in modern terms. Hitting back, even at a punching bag, keeps the anger going. A short pause lets it settle on its own.
Try this. When a harsh word lands, give it two minutes before you answer. Stay quiet, or step out of the room. Then come back to the subject later, when both of you are calm. The pause is not giving in. It is choosing when to have the talk.
Sama-pradhana: When the Grudge Is Inside the Family
Family grudges are the hardest because we cannot simply walk away. We meet at weddings, at festivals, at the hospital when a parent is unwell. The hurt is old, but the meetings keep coming. The words that sit around kshamavan in verse 8.18 read almost like a plan for this.
Kruddhanam anuneta, one who calms the angry. In a family quarrel, someone has to be the first to lower the temperature. Charaka counts that as good conduct, not as losing.
Sama-pradhana, one who puts the gentle way first. Sama means conciliation: talking, persuading, finding the common ground. Put first, it means the hard conversation happens calmly, at a time you choose, not in the middle of the next fight.
Amarshaghna, one who puts an end to resentment. Resentment is the grudge kept warm. Ending it is a decision about your own mind; it does not need the other person to do anything first.
Raga-dvesha-hetunam hanta, one who removes the causes of attachment and aversion. Many family feuds run on a cause that can be named: a share of land, a debt, a word said at a wedding. Dealing with that cause, where it can be dealt with, often does more than any number of arguments about who was right.
Sama-pradhana: the hard conversation, held calmly, at a time you choose.
The Greater Good Science Center at the University of California, Berkeley, describes how psychologists define forgiveness: a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance towards someone who has harmed you, whether or not they deserve it. That is close to Charaka's amarshaghna. It is also why forgiving can start before the other person says sorry.
Letting an Old Grudge Go This Week
Charaka asks for good conduct to be practised always (8.17). A week is only a start, but it is enough to loosen a grudge you have carried for years. Keep a small notebook or a note on your phone for it.
Day 1: name it. Write down one grudge you carry: who, what happened, and how long ago.
Day 2: notice the replay. Each time the story comes back to you, make a mark. Notice what your body does: the jaw, the shoulders, the breath.
Day 3: their side. Write three things that were going on in their life when it happened. You may not know them for sure. Guessing is the point.
Day 4: separate the act from the person. Write "what they did was wrong", and under it, one good thing about them that you still know to be true.
Day 5: the two-minute rule. Any harsh word today, from anyone, gets two minutes before you answer.
Day 6: one small step. A short message. A greeting at the next family event. Or simply not retelling the old story to someone new. You choose the size.
Day 7: decide. Forgiving is a decision, and you may have to make it again when the memory returns. Write down what you are letting go of, and when you will check in with yourself.
A one-line reminder. The hurt happened once. The grudge is every time you replay it.
What Forgiving Is Not
It is not saying they were right. In the Greater Good Science Center's words, forgiveness does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean condoning or excusing offenses. You can forgive and still say clearly that what happened was wrong. Our reel puts it in one line: forgiving does not mean calling what they did right.
It is not making up, and not trusting blindly. Forgiving is your decision about your own resentment. Rebuilding a relationship needs both people, and the same source notes that forgiving does not oblige you to reconcile with the person who harmed you. Whom to trust, and how far, is a separate question, one Charaka answers in his rules of trust.
It is not staying in harm's way. Bearing a harsh word in the moment is not the same as living with cruelty or violence. If someone is hurting you, your safety comes first. You can forgive in your own mind and still keep your distance, and still ask the people you trust, or the authorities, for help.
It is not a diagnosis. If anger or hurt comes with constant distress, sleeplessness, or thoughts you cannot put down, that is worth taking to a doctor or a counsellor, not to a verse.
The research is not proof of Charaka. Both experiments on this page were done in American university laboratories, over minutes, not years. Each was designed for its own question, not to test a text written some two thousand years ago. What they show is narrower and still worth knowing: a habit Charaka lists as good conduct matches what we now know about grudges and venting.
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Frequently asked questions
What does the Charaka Samhita say about forgiveness? +
Charaka Samhita Sutrasthana 8.18, part of sadvritta (the code of good conduct), lists kshamavan, forbearing and forgiving, among the qualities of a good person. The same verse adds paraparushavachana-sahishnu, one who can bear others' harsh words, and amarshaghna, one who puts an end to resentment.
What does kshamavan mean? +
Kshama is forgiveness or forbearance, and kshamavan is a person who has it: someone who can hold back from paying a hurt back. The 2020 Charaka Samhita edition renders the word as forbearing.
What does paraparushavachana-sahishnu mean? +
It is a compound of four words: para (others), parusha (harsh), vachana (words) and sahishnu (one who can bear). It describes a person who can bear other people's harsh words without striking back. The 2020 edition renders it as being tolerant of harsh words.
Is holding a grudge bad for you? +
In a 2001 experiment by Witvliet, Ludwig and Vander Laan, people who nursed a grudge while remembering someone who had hurt them showed bigger rises in heart rate, blood pressure, sweating and frowning than when they imagined forgiving that person. It was a short laboratory measure, not a long-term study, but it shows the body reacting each time a grudge is replayed.
Does venting anger help? +
Not in Bushman's 2002 experiment. Insulted students who hit a punching bag while thinking of their insulter ended up the angriest and most aggressive. Those who sat quietly for two minutes had the lowest anger and aggression. Doing nothing at all worked better than venting.
Do I have to forgive someone who is not sorry? +
Charaka's word describes the forgiving person and puts no condition on the other side. Psychologists, as the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley explains, see forgiveness as your own decision to release resentment, whether or not the other person deserves it. Making up with them is a separate step that needs both of you.
How can I let go of an old family grudge? +
Start small: name the grudge, notice how often you replay it, and think through what was going on in the other person's life at the time. Give every harsh word two minutes before you answer, and have the real conversation later, calmly. The week plan on this page walks through it day by day.
Where is this in the Charaka Samhita, and which translation is used? +
Charaka Samhita, Sutrasthana, chapter 8 (Indriyopakramaniya Adhyaya), verse 18. The Sanskrit on this page follows the 2020 edition of the Charak Samhita Research, Training and Skill Development Centre; the word-by-word renderings are our own plain English, checked against that edition.
